Tag Archive: law of attraction


Mind the mind

 

It has been a wonderful month full of epiphanies! Here’s one more:

I had heard a talk once by Abraham Hicks about how a man wanted to win some gazillion dollars in lottery and he was asking how he could apply the Law of attraction to bring about that situation. So Abraham asked him to describe what he would do after winning all that money. If I am not mistaken, he wanted to win something like 10 million dollars. So he started describing all that he would do after winning 10 million dollars. But his wish-list didn’t even extend beyond 1 million dollars. That’s when Abraham said that his mind was not even ready to receive those 10 million dollars since he couldn’t imagine what he would do with those dollars. And hence it’s mighty difficult to believe with thought and emotion what the mind can’t conjure.

And I now know that to be true not just about money but about every aspect of life. The mind needs to stretch FIRST in order to attract things  into reality. It’s in fact not even just about getting a lot of money, or the most perfect relationship or the most gratifying career. I know of people who have over-flowing bank accounts full of wealth but they’re not attempting even half the things that I do even with my not-so-overwhelming income! But I am learning from and observing people who do a lot more with their money to grow themselves, to acquire skills, travel etc. In other words, I am stretching my mind so that when I become my idea of “wealthy”, I’ll know what to do with my wealth apart from eating, drinking, partying, shopping and other such mundane things. So I decided to put a different spin on “why am I not a millionaire yet?????” thought. I am instead grateful because honestly, this is exactly how I would want it to be.

I think it’s a similar thing with romantic relationships. At one point in time, attracting money was a huge challenge in my life. It’s not anymore. I am not averse to or afraid of wealth anymore. I know I am going to be wealthy. I am on the way. Now my next “challenge” is relationships. I have learnt so much from the ones that I’ve had that now I feel better knowing what I don’t want. I haven’t felt more clear about this EVER before. I now know my worth and I know what makes me special. Secretly in the recesses of my own heart I have finally admitted to myself that I am a brilliant musician with a very subtle yet sharp understanding between different streams of music. This is not arrogance. It’s just knowing something undeniable. And knowing it makes me feel great and grateful. Hence, I will be unable to walk into something through the pet door. I don’t care if it takes long, because I know that I am worth the wait. If you’ve noticed, I am talking about the importance of self-worth more than romantic relationships. But that’s the whole point. A healthy self-image is indispensable to a gratifying relationship with another human being. Personally, I feel good about myself because I take responsibility, I introspect and make changes and I am a giver…that’s how I am made and I think it’s a very desirable quality. Make a list of things that you like about your romantic personality and see your belief rise. I can’t predict when the “person of my dreams” is going to come wafting through the clouds. But I am preparing myself anyway. And the preparation feels awesome! Again I am stretching my mind into believing that I am worth it, I deserve love and respect, I deserve a long-term, fun relationship with someone who will love and adore me openly as much as I’ll love them…if not more.

It’s all in the mind. All of it. Events are just events. They become consequences only depending upon our perception of them.

Focus on what makes you happy. Anything. It doesn’t matter what you’re focusing on. Try it again and again. Because THAT is totally worth the effort.

universe

I always always know when something amazing is about to happen. It sounds a bit strange since we’re only used to hearing how we know beforehand when something terrible is about to happen. But really, I always know about wonderful news. It may be because I do something very specific and ritualistic everytime I feel like I am stuck in a place or emotion where I’d rather NOT be. In that sense, yesterday was the last straw. I wasted my whole day sulking and terrifying myself about various aspects about my seemingly difficult life. I felt utter hopelessness in people and humanity, listless about love and relationships, insecure about my talents, afraid of what all these thoughts would do to my health. It was a terrible day which I had brought upon myself and I couldn’t get out of it. But then I got up from the bed in a swift motion and shouted “ENOUGH” at my innocent bedroom walls. I don’t know what magic that word ‘enough’ had or perhaps physically moving into a standing posture did it, but something in me changed. It was like a warrior woke up from his slumber. It was then that I decided to take things into my own hands and change whatever was gnawing into my heart. I closed the blinds, put on lights and music and started talking to myself about what was bothering me. I was asking myself questions out loud, “So now what are you going to do about it?!” and then I would answer myself, “I know that the only effective way is to do things within my control and let go of the rest. But it’s hard. Very hard.” Then consoled myself, “I know. I of all people know that it is hard. But how long can you waste time like this? You have things to do, wonderful things to achieve! Go after them now.”

I started feeling better. It was like someone with my highest good and utmost love in mind was talking directly to me, wanting to help me out of this deep hole that I’d dug myself. And then something miraculous happened. I started laughing. Alone. Laughing at the things that were hurting me, holding me down! I mean LAUGHING! It was funny and a bit scary because I really thought I was losing my mind. Then I laughed and cried a little simultaneously and then…BOOM! Clarity dawned.

I sat down and wrote in my book where I usually pen down poetry and compositions. I wrote this:”I have decided that I have finished sulking. That’s the good news. There’s no bad news. From now on slowly and steadily I will start renewing my life, start rethinking goals and work toward them. Fitness, music, wealth, money, love, my philosophy…everything anew. I knew I would be tired of crying very soon.”

And the Universe responded in less than ten minutes with an amazing opportunity for my career! Then in the morning I got a call for work which is to be done tomorrow. The Universe wants to pay me in cash and kind! And this is how I know when something awesome is about to happen to me. Every time I have taken even a small step in the right direction, the Universe has responded with such signs to tell me that I am heading the correct way. Every single time.

I recommend the self-induced laughter therapy very strongly. Whatever it is that will make one feel even a little better is good enough! It feels crazy at first. But hey, it’s not as bat-shit crazy like sulking! So, go for it!

Partners in crime?

I just came across this quote by Alain de Botton

Tendencies you complain of in your partner (he’s too weak, she’s too strict, he’s too cold), you have in yourself: own before dumping.

grin686l

It got me thinking. And thoughts similar to these have always made me wonder if there’s literal truth in it.

So what does that mean? Is it to be taken literally?

I don’t think it’s even logically possible to arrive at that conclusion. Because to take it literally would mean that if one’s partner is physically abusive, then even the person themselves are abusive. Or if one is a compulsive cheater, then even the partner is a cheater. But these conclusions do not make any sense. Is an angry person’s partner also angry? Is a cold person’s love-interest cold too? So then all people who are more similar to each other than different from each other, would face more relationship troubles. Because by this logic, only a non-affectionate person would complain about a non-affectionate partner, only a disrespectful, abusive, judgmental person would complain about a disrespectful, abusive, judgmental partner. But truth is that we see far too many examples of couples being radically different from each other and yet facing very grave relationship problems.

I am a big fan and believer of the Law of Attraction and it says

That which is like unto itself, is drawn.

And the answer lies here. What one focuses on with thought and emotion, manifests. Simple.

There’s someone I know whose relationships have been quite tumultuous to say the least. And all of their relationships ultimately broke because they got cheated on. It was like a pattern. They were wonderful in the beginning and then they all headed the same way. What went wrong? Well, I’d think that when we begin to expect certain outcomes from our relationships, whether because of our insecurities or very strong past experiences, we focus on these outcomes(which haven’t yet manifest) by dwelling on the past and allowing all these overwhelming feelings to well up and then similar situations start lining up again and again. Also as far as complaints about our partner go, they are our complaints to our own self. For example, I had a partner who would call me ugly. Really. Not even masking it. The word was UGLY. I laugh over it now. But at that time it felt terrible. In retrospect I feel that I didn’t believe I was good-looking to start with and I kind of attracted that behaviour from them. I am in no way justifying what they did! But I am specially mentioning this because, after this relationship ended(I ended it), I joined a gym, got in shape, felt genuinely good about myself, got around to being an awesome musician etc. And then the next partner I dated was wonderful! They made me feel like the sexiest thing on two legs. I felt sexy, confident, like I could take on an entire room. It’s not like I turned into a swan overnight! I changed how I felt about myself and therefore I saw that change in my partner as well. In fact my partner thought that I looked hot even with a toothbrush dangling from the corner of my mouth!

This sort of explanation makes the most sense to me. I can say this much with guarantee that if your better-half(or worse-half) treats you less than right, it’s perhaps because you’re not expecting to be treated just right as well. So, yeah that’s kind of your work to do; to work on your self-worth, self-love, decide what you want from life, decide that you deserve it. That’s the work.

I will be honest, I haven’t exercised today. I am writing this too with the last bit of my willpower! So let’s write good things about day 8 tomorrow. Great! So we all agree 😛
The silver lining to my unbelievable fatigue is that I spent my day and energy doing what absolutely love…which is playing guitar and performing before people! And I am gainfully self-employed doing that. How grateful am I!
So there we have it : I didn’t exercise because I was busy doing what I absolutely love doing. Guilt turned into Gratitude. Mission accomplished.
Off to bed to enjoy my well-earned sleep 🙂